Appendix B

Insight Meditation Instructions
A Series of Guided Meditations

(Drawn from retreats-John Orr and Barbara Brodsky.)

We recommend that you work with these instructions slowly, reading a section and then practicing with it before moving on. Eventually your practice will include all five sections, but there is no hurry. We hope you'll relax and enjoy meeting each section.

Beginning

It is helpful to establish mindfulness of body at the beginning for several reasons. One is that we tend not to be in our bodies, some of us, but rather more in our minds, thinking, not in deep touch with the physical aspects of our being. So when we do sitting meditation, standing meditation, walking meditation, a lot of our instruction is to be in our body. Awareness of posture is very helpful here. Awareness of breath. Awareness of physical sensation. Then we can move on to awareness of other sense consciousness beyond the body sensations, awareness of emotional consciousness and of mind.

You will be most comfortable with a zabuton or a cushion or blanket that you can place under your legs, beneath your ankles and feet and knees, so that they have something to rest on, something to cushion them from the hardness of the floor. A zafu or other cushioning underneath your buttocks will lift your spine. Position it so you're not sitting on the flat surface and rolling backward but rather, sitting on the forward edge of the cushion so that your pelvis tips under and the spine is naturally lengthening upwards.

At the beginning of the sitting, it may be helpful to take a few deeper breaths, deeper longer breaths, inhaling, and then slowly exhaling. As you exhale, allow your body to release tension in those areas where you habitually hold it-perhaps the shoulders, chest, stomach or the back. With each exhalation, feel your body softening and relaxing.

To bring awareness to posture, start with the base of the body, noticing the position of the legs, ankles and feet as a tripod. Bring your attention to this foundation. Notice the position of the legs and the pelvis.

You are not lifting the spine from the top or the bottom. Rather, bring awareness to the erector muscles on either side of the spine; these lengthen the spine gently upward towards the shoulder blades. You may feel as if gentle hands supported erectness by lifting under the edges of the rib cage. Feel a little bit of lifting under the shoulder blades too, lifting without tensing the lower back. Allow those lower back muscles to be relaxed.

As you experience this gentle lifting beneath the rib cage, beneath the shoulder blades, see that there's some space created between the bottom of your rib cage and your pelvis. Lengthening.

Roll the shoulders back; let the tops of the shoulders fall away from the ears. The tops of the shoulders are relaxed. Notice some roundness and curvature where the upper arm meets the shoulder socket. You can have your hands cupped one inside the other on your lap, perhaps the thumbs touching together, or rest them on your thighs if that is more comfortable. Each position has its own benefits. See what fits you. No rules here.

Slightly tuck under the chin while the throat remains soft, relaxed; gently push backward on the upper lip. The throat and the neck remain relaxed, untensed, as are all the facial muscles. Feel gentle hands lifting the head, just below and behind the ears, skull softly lifted to erectness.

Skin of the forehead relaxing down toward your eyes. Eyes very soft. Eyelids gently covering your eyes, unless you're used to meditating with your eyes open. If you are accustomed to practice with the eyes open and are comfortable like that, that's fine. Area behind the eyes relaxed, the corners of the eyes smiling.

You may wish to focus the closed eyes on the inner wall of the forehead, the third eye. See it as a blank screen upon which the inner gaze rests.

All the facial muscles softening, relaxing from the inside out. Any tightness in the face can release, any holding. As we smile and relax into our bodies, tension can let go.

Let the lower jaw hang open, so the lips separate a bit. Let the lower jaw hang open so any tension in the jaw joints can release. Slight smile in the corners of the mouth, the inner smile, Buddha smile, feeling of lightness in the corners of the mouth. We smile into the moment, into our body.

Bring gentle awareness to the throat, smiling into your throat, mid area of the throat, Adam's apple area. Be aware of any sensations as you smile into your body, moving now to the area of the throat. Perhaps sensations are apparent, perhaps not; either way, it's okay. Move awareness down into the base of the throat, your jugular notch.

Smiling down into the chest, left side of the chest, left lung, right side of the chest, right lung. Smiling into the body. Experiencing it … Establishing mindfulness in the present moment; mindfulness of body … Smiling into the heart center, in the area of the physical heart. Touching the heart with awareness.

Smiling into the abdomen. Take a deep breath into the chest or the abdomen. Take a deep breath, hold it momentarily, and then slowly exhale. As you do, feel the chest and stomach relax. Do that two or three times: silent deep breaths; each exhale with awareness. Relaxing into your body.

As you smile into the abdomen, let it be soft. Soft belly; Buddha belly. No holding of any tension in the stomach. Letting go of fear. Relaxing the abdomen.

As you breath, you may notice a slight lifting in your sternum, as though there is a string tied to your sternum and it's being lifted up on an angle.

Right now, each of us is breathing, a natural function of our body. Being mindful of breathing, we simply turn attention to this process happening already. Our body is breathing in, and it's breathing out. Anapanasati is mindfulness of breathing-simply to be aware when we're breathing in; aware, mindful when we're breathing out. It's taking one breath at a time. Know when you're breathing in, and know when you're breathing out. Breathing in, be aware of the whole body. Breathing out, be aware of the whole body.

(Some time of practice.)

Breathing

Allow a smile in the corners of your eyes and mouth, an inner smile; it doesn't have to be outer, just an inner feeling of lightness in the corners of your eyes and mouth. Call it Buddha smile. It's a radiance, a lightness.

We focus on the breath as the primary object. Be aware of the breath at the nostrils or wherever it's clearest to you. If your normal breathing is through the mouth, be aware of the breath coming and going through the mouth.

Notice the physical sensation of the breath touching at mouth or nostrils, the coolness of the in breath, the warm softness of the out breath.

Know when you're breathing in; know when you're breathing out. Allow the breath to find its own rhythm and flow; we are not controlling it, just observing it, trusting in the body and the breath. Knowing when you're breathing in, and knowing when you're breathing out, your breath becomes the primary object.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath.

Sometimes it can be helpful to extend and lengthen the breath at the beginning of a sitting, so that you begin to focus on the entirety of the inhalation and the exhalation, and on the pauses or apertures between the inhalation and the exhalation and between the exhalation and the inhalation.

This pause between the breaths is the 'now,' just this very moment. Noticing this aperture helps to bring us more deeply into the present moment and concentrates the mind: awareness also brings us deep into the heart center.

Experience your breath as a circle. There is a beginning portion of the inhalation, a middle of the inhalation, and then the latter part of the inhalation, a slight pause in the breath, and then the beginning of the exhalation, the middle portion of the exhalation, and the end of the exhalation. A slight pause, and, again, the beginning of the inhalation, and the whole cycle begins once again.

As you allow the breath to become more subtle and natural, you may not sense the entire length of the inhalation or the exhalation. That's okay. Become aware of as much of the breath as possible.

Know when you're breathing in and know when you're breathing out, when you're breathing in a long breath and when you're breathing in a short breath. Breathing in, allow the whole body to be calm and at peace. Breathing out, allow the whole body to be calm and at peace.

As the mind begins to slow down, become more calm and focused, awareness penetrates more deeply and the full length and duration of the breath and the pauses between the exhalation and the inhalation become more noticeable.

(Some time of practice.)

Natural concentration

The breath is the primary object but this is not a forced concentration. With natural concentration, we focus attention on what is dominant in our experience. If physical sensation, thought, image or emotion pulls attention away from the breath, know that your attention has moved from the breath. Know when your attention has moved to physical sensation, thinking, image or emotion.

People often think that because a strong sensation, thought, image or emotion draws their attention and they're not with the breath, they're not meditating, that they're being distracted, or that they're not concentrating. Actually, focusing upon that strong sensation develops deeper concentration, because the mind is holding to an object. That's very powerful focus. It's a fine opportunity to develop concentration and mindfulness.

Remember, it's not better to be with one object than another, not better to be with the breath than with a physical sensation, image, thought or emotion. Be with whatever is the predominant experience in the moment.

If you find that an intense sensation keeps pulling your attention away from the breathing towards that sensation, turn your attention to it. Lightly note it, creating some space for the experience, placing awareness on the sensation.

If the sensation is unpleasant, watch the tendency to want to push the sensation away, to not want it. No judgment of aversion, just noticing it arise. Move deeply into the sensation and see how it may change, how it may not be one block of pain, one strong sensation, but little sensations that are arising, ceasing and changing with varying levels of intensity.

If the sensation is pleasant, watch the tendency to want to hold on to it. No judgment of attachment, just noticing it arise. How does sensation change as you touch it with merciful, non-judgmental awareness? What about the attachment to that pleasant sensation?

Are some sensations neutral, calling up neither like nor dislike?

Creating room for the experience, you may find that it moves to another part of the body, from the shoulders down to the back, to a different part of the back, or to the legs. Stay with the experience as long as you are able without doing violence to your body, to yourself. We learn how to work skillfully with meditation and strong bodily sensations.

Tightness in the legs or back, or itching, tingling, pain, any physical sensation, turn your attention to the sensation and note it three times: sensation, sensation, sensation.

If you prefer, note it more specifically as 'pain, pain, pain,' 'tightness, tightness, tightness,' or as 'itching, itching, itching.' Not, 'I have pain in my right knee,' which snares us into the story of the pain. Just observing the sensation and noting it as sensation or as pain.

As you turn your awareness to the sensation, notice what happens to it. Does it disappear immediately? Does it fade gradually? Does it intensify? Lessen in intensity? Move about? Does it change into another sensation?

When you find a sensation changing in any way, mentally bring the attention back to the breath as the primary object. Know you have returned to the breath. Know when you're breathing in; know when you're breathing out.

As you're aware of your breathing, if thoughts arise of the past or future, and if the thoughts become predominant, if you find yourself more with the thoughts than with the breath, bring your attention to the thought.

A thought of the past, noting it as 'remembering, remembering, remembering.' Watch what happens as you note it. Does it disappear immediately? Does it fade gradually? Does it persist or turn into another thought? What's the nature of it?

A planning thought, a future oriented thought? Note it as 'planning, planning, planning,' or as 'fantasizing, fantasizing, fantasizing.' Watch and see how it changes as you note it, as you watch it.

When the thought is no longer predominant, or changes in some way, gently bring the attention back to the breath as being the primary object. Know when you're breathing in; know when you're breathing out.

You may have an image that arises in your mind. Some people experience their mind more in images than in thoughts. Treat it the same way as any other mental formation. If, for example, an image arises of yourself seeing and talking to someone else, and if that experience is strong enough to bring the attention away from the breath, turn your attention to that image. Note it as 'seeing, seeing, seeing.'

What happens to the image when you touch it with awareness? What is the nature of this object? Does it change when you focus your attention upon it? When the image no longer predominates, bring your attention back to the breath as primary object.

If emotion arises and predominates, know that you are experiencing that emotion. Note it as 'anger, anger, anger,' or perhaps as 'fear, fear, fear,' or bliss, joy, jealousy, restlessness, boredom, whatever it may be. Again, we note 'anger, anger, anger,' not 'I'm feeling angry about what he said …' so as not to become entangled in the story, only to know that this mind/body is experiencing anger.

What happens as you note it? Does it strengthen? Fade? Change? Dissolve? When it is no longer predominant, move awareness back to the breath.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath. Breathing in and breathing out, be aware of the whole body and mind.

(Some time of practice.)

Deepening

If the physical sensation, thought, image or emotion returns and is predominant, again move awareness to it-gentle, non-judgmental awareness. Choiceless awareness that moves to whatever is predominant in the mind and body.

If the sensation, thought or emotion has returned and called awareness to it, there is something there that needs to be investigated, not by a probing mind that theorizes but by observing, being fully present with that sensation, thought or feeling and allowing it to be present within the mind/body.

Choiceless awareness. No preference of the breath, the thought, the sensation. Being fully with whatever is. No judgment. Observing.

When sensation, thought or emotion changes or is no longer predominant, move awareness back to the breath.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath.

See how you relate to sensation, thought, or emotion when it arises. Is there a desire to push it away, to not want it because it's unpleasant? Is there a desire to hold onto it when it is pleasant?

Mindfulness of physical sensations can teach us a lot about our relationship with our body, and about our patterns of attachment and aversion. If a pleasant sensation, tingling, moving of energy, or feeling of lightness in the body becomes predominant, turn your attention to it and note it as: 'tingling, tingling, tingling,' or 'lightness, lightness, lightness.' What happens to it as you touch it with awareness? Does it disappear immediately? Does it fade gradually? Does it intensify? Does it change into another sensation?

How do you relate to the situation? Is there a tendency to want to hold onto the sensation because it's pleasant? Is there attachment to continuation of the sensation in the body? Or can you just experience the bodily sensation with equanimity, noting it, seeing what happens to it?

What if it is an unpleasant sensation, pain, tightness, burning? What happens to it when you touch it with awareness? Does it fade, move, intensify, change? Is there a desire to push it away, to get rid of it? Can you just experience the unpleasant sensation with equanimity, noting it and watching to see what happens to it?

Notice the same process with the arising of thought, image or emotion. Is there a desire to hold onto the pleasant, to get rid of the unpleasant. Can you watch that liking, followed by the next primary object, desire or attachment-wanting to hold on to? Can you watch aversion, followed by wanting to get rid of? What happens to the attachment or aversion when you watch it?

If fear arises about what is observed, and if the fear becomes predominant, allow that to become the focus. 'Fear, fear, fear.' What happens to the fear as it is watched? Can we watch fear without fear? Can there be equanimity even with fear? When it changes or loses its intensity, return again to the breath as primary object.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath. Breathing in, be aware of the activities of the mind. Breathing out, be aware of the activities of the mind.

No judgment of what you're experiencing. If judgment arises note, 'judgment, judgment, judgment.' Judgment is just a mental formation. As you note it, see what happens to it; see its impermanence, its emptiness. Can we watch with equanimity as judgment arises, without judgment of that experience? When judgment is no longer predominant, bring the attention back to the breath as the primary object. Breathing in, breathing out. Breathing in, and breathing out.

If you find that it's very difficult to bring your attention back to the primary object because the physical sensation is so strong, and it no longer feels helpful to stay with the strong sensation, you can move.

Before you move, see the intention to move. The body doesn't move automatically. The mind must give the impulse for the body to move. If pain leads to intention to move the position of the legs, for instance, be aware of that intention, and then mindfully shift position to ease the discomfort. Be aware of the sensations, aware of the intention, aware of the movement. Meditation continues; there's no break in the continuity of the awareness.

When you feel ready, you can come back to the primary awareness: breathing in and breathing out, breathing in, pause, breathing out. As thoughts arise, if they're strong enough to draw the attention away from the breath, treat them the same way as bodily sensations.

We cannot shift positions to escape the pain of thoughts or emotions. Can you watch them and make space for them? What happens to the mental formation as you note it? Does it disappear, fade, intensify, lessen in intensity, turn into another memory or thought pattern? See its impermanent, empty nature. It changes, dissolves in time. When you see a change in some way, and thought or emotion is no longer predominant, bring your attention back to the breath as the primary object.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath. Breathing in and out, be aware of the activities of mind.

(Some period of practice.)

Insight

In insight meditation, we want to see the nature of body and mind, and of all of the five aggregates-form, feeling, perception, mental formation and consciousness. Watch them arise and pass away. Watch them change. Notice the interrelationships between them, not thinking about these interrelationships, just noticing, observing the constant movement.

You may have a deeper insight into the impermanence of these aggregates and the emptiness of self therein. Observing body and mind, sensations, thoughts, feelings, perception, consciousness.

You may begin to notice that all phenomena, empty of self, arise when conditions are present to lead to their arising. When those conditions cease, the phenomena fade.

Arising, dissolving. Always in motion. Impermanent. Empty of self.

Consider the lines from the Heart Sutra:

… All dharmas are empty.

They are not born nor annihilated.

They are not defiled nor immaculate.

They do not increase, nor decrease.

So in emptiness, no form, no feeling, no perception, no mental formation, no consciousness.

… No knowledge, no attainment, no realization,

For there is nothing to attain …

The illusion of permanent self dissolving as awareness penetrates and knows the illusion. Moving deeper, beyond the small self, beyond aversion and attachment, beyond ignorance.

Finding space for all experience to float in that Heart we all share.

The vehicle of choiceless awareness. No judgment of what is seen, no preference for the place awareness shines. Being fully with what is, observing.

If preference or judgment is seen, notice that-'preferring, preferring, preferring,' or 'judging, judging, judging.' No judgment about the preferring or judging. Space for it all to float in choiceless awareness.

When sensation, thought, image or emotion changes or is no longer predominant, move awareness back to the breath.

Know when you are breathing in. Know when you are breathing out. Know when you are breathing in a long breath. Know when you are breathing out a long breath. Know when you are breathing in a short breath. Know when you are breathing out a short breath. Breathing in and out, observing the impermanent nature of all dharmas. Breathing in and out, observing the fading of all dharmas. Breathing in and out and contemplating letting go.

Grasp at nothing. Cling to nothing. Push away nothing in your experience. Be present. Be mindful. Be aware.

It is a gentle, timeless process. Just watching it all unfold. Choiceless awareness. All experience floating in the open heart.